IELTS Writing Task 1 report sample 2921 – Band 6.0

Academic IELTS Writing Task 1 - Report

You should spend about 20 minutes on this task.

The charts below show the percentage of water used for different purposes in six areas of the world.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Write at least 150 words.

Disclaimer

The writing sample displayed here is the work of IELTS candidates and has been assessed by our team for guidance and practice purposes. These scores are not official IELTS scores.

Candidate’s Response:

The pie charts offer a detailed comparison of water consumption in three sectors (industrial, agricultural and domestic) in six areas in the world (North America, South America, Europe, Africa, Central Asia, and South East Asia). Overall, the percentage of water used for industrial purposes is dominant in North America and Europe, while for remaining areas in the question, agriculture is the main purpose for water consumption.

To begin with, North America and Europe have similar pattern regarding the Industrial use of water, comprise of a considerable amount of water consumption at 48% and 53% respectively. Approximately one-third of water used is for agriculture for these developed areas. Domestic water consumption in North America is only 13% similar to Europe by a meagre increase to 15%.

Turning to the remaining areas, the percentage of water used vary with agricultural use, dominate among others in Central Asia by 88%, followed by Africa, South East Asia, and South America by 84%, 81% and 71% respectively. However, the domestic use of water accounts for the highest percentage in South America by 19%. Africa by 9% has the second place, and only 7% of the total makes up the domestic use for both Central Asia and South East Asia. South East Asia accounts for 12% water consumption by only 2% more than that of South America. Industrial use of water comprises of the least amount of percentage in Central Asia by 5%, has a negligible increase compared to Africa by only 7%.

247 words
Presented By: Shahab Hosseinzadeh

Presented By: Shahab Hosseinzadeh

May 24, 2024

This is an IELTS writing band 6.0 sample

Disclaimer

The writing sample displayed here is the work of IELTS candidates and has been assessed by our team for guidance and practice purposes. These scores are not official IELTS scores.

IELTS Writing Band Descriptors:

Task Achievement (Ac)
7.0 covers the requirements of the task
8.0 presents, highlights and illustrates key features clearly and appropriately
7.0 could be more fully extended
9.0 presents a clear overview of main trends, differences, or stages
7.0
Coherence and Cohesion
7.0 logically organizes information and ideas
6.0 there is a clear overall progression
5.0 makes inadequate, inaccurate, or over-use of cohesive devices
6.0 may not always use referencing clearly or appropriately
6.0 uses paragraphing, but not always logically
5.0
Lexical Resource
7.0 uses a sufficient range of vocabulary to allow some flexibility and precision
6.0 attempts to use less common vocabulary but with some inaccuracy
6.0 makes some errors in spelling and/or word formation
6.0 they do not impede communication
6.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
7.0 uses a variety of complex structures
7.0 produces frequent error-free sentences
6.0 makes some errors in grammar and punctuation
6.0 errors rarely reduce communication
6.0
6.0

Feedback:

Task Achievement (TA)
The report effectively summarizes the information and highlights the main features of the charts, making relevant comparisons between different regions. However, some details are misinterpreted or unclear, and the overall summary could be more concise and precise. The report includes all necessary information but lacks clarity in some parts.

Coherence and Cohesion (CC)
The report is logically organized, with a clear structure that includes an overall statement followed by detailed analysis. The use of linking words and phrases is generally effective, but some sentences are overly complex, which affects readability. Varied linking phrases could enhance the flow and cohesion of the text.

Lexical Resource (LR)
The vocabulary used is appropriate and includes some variety, demonstrating a good range of lexical resource. However, there are some awkward word choices and repetitions. More sophisticated vocabulary and correct usage would improve the overall quality of the report.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy (GRA)
The report uses a variety of grammatical structures, including complex sentences, and most sentences are grammatically correct. Nonetheless, there are errors in subject-verb agreement, prepositions, and punctuation, which affect readability. Improved grammatical accuracy and more careful proofreading are needed.

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The 6.0 sample upgraded to 7.0+

The pie charts depict the water usage patterns for different purposes in six regions of the world. While agricultural use dominates in most regions, significant variations exist across the six areas.
Asia, Africa, Southeast Asia, and South America show the most significant water consumption in agriculture, exceeding 70% in each region. Central Asia has the highest dependence on agriculture, with a staggering 88% of water allocated for this purpose. In contrast, South America allocates 71% of its water to agriculture, while Africa and Southeast Asia dedicate 84% and 81% respectively.
America and Europe exhibit distinct water usage patterns compared to the other four regions. In these two regions, industrial use takes the lead, consuming 48% and 53% of water, respectively. Domestic use remains relatively low in all six regions, ranging from 5% in Central Asia to 19% in South America.
While agriculture dominates in most regions, South America presents a unique case with a more balanced distribution of water usage. Although agriculture remains the primary consumer (71%), South America allocates a higher proportion (19%) to domestic use compared to other regions.
Overall, the pie charts highlight the varying water usage patterns across different regions of the world. While agriculture is the dominant user in most regions, significant disparities exist, with some areas relying heavily on agriculture and others prioritizing industrial use.
221 words

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