IELTS Writing Task 1 report sample 2920 – Band 6.0

Academic IELTS Writing Task 1 - Report

You should spend about 20 minutes on this task.

The charts below show the proportions of British students at one university in England who were able to speak other languages in addition to English, in 2000 and 2010.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Write at least 150 words.

Disclaimer

The writing sample displayed here is the work of IELTS candidates and has been assessed by our team for guidance and practice purposes. These scores are not official IELTS scores.

Candidate’s Response:

The pie charts compared the breakdown in percentages of the UK students from a university who spoke a second language besides English, divided to six categories (no other language, French only, German only Spanish only, another language, and two other languages) in Great Britain in the year 2000 and 2010. Overall, the desire towards speaking another language, two other languages and Spanish increased in 2010, and Spanish only, was the dominant group in both the given years.

To begin with, the percentage of the three groups (Spanish only, another language, and two other languages) increased in 2010. The category of Spanish only, topped the chart at 30% in 2000, and stayed at the highest percentage by 5% increase in 2010. Similarly, another language spoken group comprised of 15% in 2000; however, it made up 20% of the total in 2010. Likewise, in 2010, the group of two other languages accounted for 15% in comparison to 10% in 2000.

With regards to the remaining categories, the percentage of the other groups declined in 2010, except for the group of German only which had the same percentage at 10% in the both years in question. In 2000, the group of no other language was the second highest percentage by 20% and 10 years later, this proportion declined to half the previous percentage. French only speakers decreased from 15% to 10% in 2000 and 2010 respectively.

233 words
Presented By: Shahab Hosseinzadeh

Presented By: Shahab Hosseinzadeh

May 3, 2024

This is an IELTS writing band 6.0 sample

Disclaimer

The writing sample displayed here is the work of IELTS candidates and has been assessed by our team for guidance and practice purposes. These scores are not official IELTS scores.

Assessor’s Comment

Thank you indeed for writing this report. The candidate has presented an overview and a clear comparison of the changes between 2000 and 2010. However, the report lacks specific data points for each category, which could have strengthened the analysis. The vocabulary is adequate and generally appropriate for the task, with some good usage of language specific to describing trends (e.g., "increased," "declined," "dominant"). However, the range of vocabulary is somewhat limited and occasionally repetitive.

This essay competently addresses the task with an appropriate level of detail and comparison. To improve the score, the candidate should focus on expanding the range of vocabulary, incorporating more varied and accurate grammatical structures, and enhancing the overall coherence with better transitions and more precise data presentation. Ensuring accuracy in data description and avoiding minor grammatical mistakes would also help in achieving a higher band score.


Kasra Sharifan

IELTS Writing Band Descriptors:

Task Achievement (Ac)
6.0 addresses the requirements of the task
6.0 presents and adequately highlights key features
7.0 could be more fully extended
6.0 presents an overview with information appropriately selected
6.0
Coherence and Cohesion
7.0 logically organizes information and ideas
7.0 there is clear progression throughout
5.0 makes inadequate, inaccurate, or over-use of cohesive devices
9.0 uses referencing clearly and appropriately throughout
6.0 uses paragraphing, but not always logically
5.0
Lexical Resource
7.0 uses a sufficient range of vocabulary to allow some flexibility and precision
7.0 uses less common lexical items with some awareness of style and collocation
6.0 makes some errors in spelling and/or word formation
6.0 they do not impede communication
6.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
7.0 uses a variety of complex structures
7.0 produces frequent error-free sentences
7.0 has good control of grammar and punctuation but may make a few errors
7.0 they do not impede communication
7.0
6.0

Feedback:

Thank you indeed for writing this report. The candidate has presented an overview and a clear comparison of the changes between 2000 and 2010. However, the report lacks specific data points for each category, which could have strengthened the analysis. The vocabulary is adequate and generally appropriate for the task, with some good usage of language specific to describing trends (e.g., "increased," "declined," "dominant"). However, the range of vocabulary is somewhat limited and occasionally repetitive.

This essay competently addresses the task with an appropriate level of detail and comparison. To improve the score, the candidate should focus on expanding the range of vocabulary, incorporating more varied and accurate grammatical structures, and enhancing the overall coherence with better transitions and more precise data presentation. Ensuring accuracy in data description and avoiding minor grammatical mistakes would also help in achieving a higher band score.

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The 6.0 sample upgraded to 7.0+

The pie charts compare the breakdown in percentages of UK university students who spoke a second language besides English, divided into six categories (no other language, French only, German only, Spanish only, another language, and two other languages) in Great Britain in the years 2000 and 2010. Overall, the desire to speak another language, two other languages, and Spanish increased in 2010, and Spanish only was the dominant group in both the given years.
To begin with, the percentages of the three groups (Spanish only, another language, and two other languages) increased in 2010. The category of Spanish only topped the chart at 30% in 2000 and stayed at the highest percentage with a 5% increase in 2010. Similarly, the other language spoken group comprised 15% in 2000, making up 20% of the total in 2010. Likewise, in 2010, the group of two other languages accounted for 15% compared to 10% in 2000.
Regarding the remaining categories, the percentage of the other groups declined in 2010, except for the German-only group, which had the same percentage at 10% in both years in question. In 2000, the group of no other language had the second-highest percentage by 20%, and 10 years later, this proportion declined to half the previous percentage. The percentage of French-only speakers decreased from 15% to 10% in 2000 and 2010, respectively.
In summary, the pie charts reveal a growing trend among British students at this university to learn languages other than English, with Spanish remaining the most popular choice. The data suggests a potential shift towards a more linguistically diverse student body over the ten-year period.
272 words

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