IELTS Writing Task 2 essay sample 3324 – Band 6.0

IELTS Writing Task 2 - Essay

You should spend about 40 minutes on this task.

Write about the following topic:

Some people say it is important to keep your home and your workplace tidy, with everything organized and in the correct place.
What is your opinion on this?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Write at least 250 words.

Disclaimer

The writing sample displayed here is the work of IELTS candidates and has been assessed by our team for guidance and practice purposes. These scores are not official IELTS scores.

Candidate’s Response:

Being tidy and organized at home and workplace are significant for some of residents. I agree with this view and explain my reasons in this essay.

Firstly, this organized and tidy can force people to be more disciplined than the opposite one. Individuals who would have to put everything in its place, would compe themselves to follow a determined trend which is well-organized. This pattern would inspire  then a sense of accuracy which lend them to being more tidy. This sensitiveness can be emerged, for instance, by people who stick to a timetable without any delay.

In addition, when people keep their home and workplace neat, would have a sense of satisfaction. This is because when a place is shipshape and organized. Psychologically, would affect individuals’ mind. Such an effect would calm fellow colleagues in a workstation. Also the people themselves who follow a systematic pattern. In this regard, a survey has reported that people could have arranged their rotine program effectively if they kept their surrounding ordered.

Moreover, by this policy, the citizens can boost their problem-solving skill. By virtue of putting everything in the right position, people would have a well-ordered mindset. Such orderly can give them a focused vision towards other issues which need more attention. For example, a survey has shown that when students have put their books on the book’s shelves, could solve the math problem in the blink of an eye in comparison to when their surroundings have been covered by an unorganized books every direction on the ground.

In conclusion, I believe that keeping home and workplace tidy would be of paramount importance to individuals. This importan is due to disciplined behavious and satisfaction as well as the problem-solving skill which are bought for people.

292 words
Presented By: Shahab Hosseinzadeh

Presented By: Shahab Hosseinzadeh

October 26, 2023

This is an IELTS writing band 6.0 sample

Disclaimer

The writing sample displayed here is the work of IELTS candidates and has been assessed by our team for guidance and practice purposes. These scores are not official IELTS scores.

IELTS Writing Band Descriptors:

Task Response
7.0 addresses all parts of the task
7.0 presents a clear position throughout the response
7.0 presents, extends, and supports main ideas, but there may be a tendency to over-generalize and/or supporting ideas may lack focus
7.0
Coherence and Cohesion
6.0 arranges information and ideas coherently
6.0 there is a clear overall progression
6.0 uses cohesive devices effectively, but cohesion within and/or between sentences may be faulty or mechanical
6.0 may not always use referencing clearly or appropriately
6.0 uses paragraphing, but not always logically
6.0
Lexical Resource
7.0 uses a sufficient range of vocabulary to allow some flexibility and precision
7.0 uses less common lexical items with some awareness of style and collocation
6.0 makes some errors in spelling and/or word formation
5.0 that may cause some difficulty for the reader
5.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
6.0 uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms
7.0 produces frequent error-free sentences
7.0 has good control of grammar and punctuation but may make a few errors
6.0 errors rarely reduce communication
6.0
6.0

Feedback:

Thank you indeed for writing this essay. The significant error is the missing subjects. When such an important word is missing, the message will be distorted, or more than one message can be conveyed. In both cases, the reader tends to get confused. In addition to vocabulary, coherence and cohesion also suffer from the missing subjects. Paragraphs can use clearer topic sentences.

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The 6.0 sample upgraded to 7.0+

In today's fast-paced world, the debate over whether one should maintain a tidy and organized home and workplace is a subject of much discussion. While some argue that it is crucial to uphold orderliness in both settings, others may prioritize different aspects of life. In my opinion, maintaining a neat and organized home and workplace is indeed vital for several reasons.
First and foremost, an organized environment promotes efficiency and productivity. A clutter-free workspace allows individuals to focus on tasks without distractions, leading to better concentration and output. Similarly, a tidy home provides a peaceful atmosphere that fosters relaxation and rejuvenation after a long day at work, enhancing overall well-being.
Secondly, an orderly setting reflects positively on an individual's character and professionalism. Employers and colleagues often perceive a well-organized workspace as a sign of responsibility and diligence. Likewise, a neat home can leave a lasting impression on visitors, creating an atmosphere of comfort and hospitality.
Furthermore, maintaining tidiness at home and work can have a significant impact on physical and mental health. Clutter and disarray can lead to stress and anxiety, while an organized environment can contribute to a sense of control and peace. A clean and organized living space also reduces the risk of accidents and health hazards, promoting overall safety.
In conclusion, I firmly believe that it is important to keep both home and workplace tidy and organized. Such an approach enhances efficiency, reflects positively on one's character, and contributes to overall well-being. Therefore, I advocate for the regular maintenance of orderliness in these essential areas of our lives.
258 words

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