IELTS Writing Task 2 essay sample 3306 – Band 6.0

IELTS Writing Task 2 - Essay

You should spend about 40 minutes on this task.

Write about the following topic:

Some people think that it is better to educate boys and girls in separate schools. Others, however, believe that boys and girls benefit more from attending mixed schools.
Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Write at least 250 words.

Disclaimer

The writing sample displayed here is the work of IELTS candidates and has been assessed by our team for guidance and practice purposes. These scores are not official IELTS scores.

Candidate’s Response:

Nowadays, education in high schools play a crucial role in forming the students’ views about the life.  these mindsets can be affected by presence of boys and girls in same schools. some people argue that starting in separate the schools results better performance While others believe that being insane schools would be more effective.

based on some persons opinion boys and girls shouldn’t go to same schools  for various reasons.  firstly each group has a specific attitudes which belong to them, and other group cannot understand their behaviors. as a case in points most of the boys behave toward others violently. not only is This Behavior veered for girls, but also girls imitate it which opposes their parents’  opinions. the other reason comes from religion.

religious family is strongly disagree with mixed schools. according to their opinion, attending in the same schools act as a precursor to ed on usual activities which are in contrast with a religious thoughts.

on the other hand, someone’s believe that education in same schools would benefit boys and girls in several days.First of all, in a class they compete with others and it would act as a catalyst to encourage them to study asiduoudly.  it is clear that this competition is positively correlated with their efficiency in the class. Moreover, they can socialize with each others  and make more friends.  a classmate from another group as a invaluable resource would afford everyone to succeed in life.

to conclude, due to higher efficiency in the class and fortifying relationship between boys and girls which would open avenues for wider success, Strongly agree that boys and girls should attend same schools.These are only a few benefits gain from starting in Mexico schools.

286 words
Presented By: Shahab Hosseinzadeh

Presented By: Shahab Hosseinzadeh

October 21, 2023

This is an IELTS writing band 6.0 sample

Disclaimer

The writing sample displayed here is the work of IELTS candidates and has been assessed by our team for guidance and practice purposes. These scores are not official IELTS scores.

IELTS Writing Band Descriptors:

Task Response
8.0 sufficiently addresses all parts of the task
7.0 presents a clear position throughout the response
7.0 presents, extends, and supports main ideas, but there may be a tendency to over-generalize and/or supporting ideas may lack focus
7.0
Coherence and Cohesion
7.0 logically organizes information and ideas
7.0 there is clear progression throughout
7.0 uses a range of cohesive devices appropriately although there may be some under-/over-use
6.0 may not always use referencing clearly or appropriately
8.0 uses paragraphing sufficiently and appropriately
6.0
Lexical Resource
7.0 uses a sufficient range of vocabulary to allow some flexibility and precision
7.0 uses less common lexical items with some awareness of style and collocation
6.0 makes some errors in spelling and/or word formation
5.0 that may cause some difficulty for the reader
5.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
7.0 uses a variety of complex structures
8.0 the majority of sentences are error-free
8.0 makes only very occasional errors or inappropriacies
7.0 they do not impede communication
7.0
6.0

Feedback:

Thank you indeed for writing this essay. Vocabulary range is varied with some errors; however, the errors must not create confusion for the reader. The essay needs to double check the use of the word “afford” to make sure it conveys a correct message.
Referencing is another key area. It is important to use the article “the” correctly to show who/what we are referring to. Here’s a good lesson to read:

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The 6.0 sample upgraded to 7.0+

The debate over whether boys and girls should be educated in separate schools or mixed schools is a topic of ongoing discussion. While both sides have valid points, a comprehensive evaluation is necessary to form an informed opinion.
Proponents of separate schools argue that this approach can lead to better concentration and fewer distractions in the classroom. They assert that when boys and girls are educated separately, there is less likelihood of gender-based distractions, fostering a more focused learning environment. Additionally, some argue that single-sex education can cater to different learning styles and preferences that may vary between genders.
On the other hand, supporters of mixed schools emphasize the advantages of real-world exposure to diverse perspectives. In a coeducational setting, boys and girls interact and collaborate, mirroring the dynamics of the professional world. This interaction nurtures social skills, communication, and mutual understanding, which are crucial for personal growth and success in an increasingly interconnected world. Moreover, mixed schools can challenge gender stereotypes and promote equality, preparing students for a society where cooperation between genders is essential.
From my perspective, the benefits of attending mixed schools outweigh those of separate schools. While separate schools may address some immediate concerns, they might inadvertently perpetuate gender divisions and limit students' ability to interact with diverse viewpoints. Mixed schools provide a holistic approach, preparing students for the realities of the broader world and fostering inclusive values. The skills learned through coeducational experiences, such as effective communication and cooperation, are essential for success in various fields and endeavors.
In conclusion, the question of whether to educate boys and girls separately or in mixed schools involves complex considerations. While both approaches have merits, the advantages of mixed schools in terms of real-world preparation, fostering diversity, and promoting equality make them a more compelling choice in today's society.
287 words

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