IELTS Writing Task 2 essay sample 3303 – Band 6.0

IELTS Writing Task 2 - Essay

You should spend about 40 minutes on this task.

Write about the following topic:

Today, more and more tourists are visiting places where conditions are difficult such as the Sahara Desert or the Antarctic.

What are the benefits and disadvantages for tourists who visit such places?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Write at least 250 words.

Environment, Task 2 essay, Travel and Tourism, Writing samples

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Disclaimer

The writing sample displayed here is the work of IELTS candidates and has been assessed by our team for guidance and practice purposes. These scores are not official IELTS scores.

Candidate’s Response:

these days, people would like to experience the places where the condition in it is Harsh. there are some advantages and disadvantages toward this trend, which I will outline here.

on the one hand, there are several positive points in this regard. firstly, these travels would be challenging and more enjoyment than normal travels without difficulty. as equipment in this places are poor, Travelers should reduce their expectations and try to adapt themselves did this hard conditions. for example, they would have to cook their food on the fire in places like the Sahara Desert. this conditions Lead them to having a sense of excitement combined with challenge. in addition, people could enhance their knowledge about such places practically, in order to publish them on their blog or for having more visits and getting advertisement from travel agencies. because going to places with heart conditions are very rare, information in a way that to be reliable is low. so individuals could travel in such remote places for Gathering precise data like photos and videos. these observations could be appealing to society. then they are being gathered by Adventures who experience Such difficulty in that places. these documentations could be released on the web’s owner to advertise them.

On the other hand, there are two drawbacks for these travels. some people could be depressed if they visit harsh conditions in locations like the Antarctic. as facilities in this places are weak, the standard of living for a short time wouldn’t live up to Travelers’ expectation. this shortage damage visitors psyche.For example, the internet won’t be covered in these places, people couldn’t use laptop for a couple of days. this leads them to suffering from such disturbance which makes individuals to experience depression. in addition, some people might lose their life by going to these remote locations. since the conditions are hard for travelers couldn’t stand this conditions. individuals’ Fitness won’t be suitable for such conditions and they may endanger their life.

in conclusion, traveling to places with harsh conditions have some benefits like make of money and having excitement and some drawbacks like mental problems and this so the dangers are they their advantages.

363 words

Presented By: Shahab Hosseinzadeh

October 18, 2023

This is an IELTS writing band 6.0 sample

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Disclaimer

The writing sample displayed here is the work of IELTS candidates and has been assessed by our team for guidance and practice purposes. These scores are not official IELTS scores.

IELTS Writing Band Descriptors:

Task Response

8.0 sufficiently addresses all parts of the task

8.0 presents a well-developed response to the question

7.0 presents, extends, and supports main ideas, but there may be a tendency to over-generalize and/or supporting ideas may lack focus

7.0

Coherence and Cohesion

9.0 sequences information and ideas logically

7.0 there is clear progression throughout

6.0 uses cohesive devices effectively, but cohesion within and/or between sentences may be faulty or mechanical

6.0 may not always use referencing clearly or appropriately

7.0 presents a clear central topic within each paragraph

6.0

Lexical Resource

7.0 uses a sufficient range of vocabulary to allow some flexibility and precision

7.0 uses less common lexical items with some awareness of style and collocation

6.0 makes some errors in spelling and/or word formation

6.0 they do not impede communication

6.0

Grammatical Range and Accuracy

7.0 uses a variety of complex structures

7.0 produces frequent error-free sentences

7.0 has good control of grammar and punctuation but may make a few errors

6.0 errors rarely reduce communication

6.0

Feedback:

Thank you indeed for writing this essay. Fewer vocabulary errors is needed. The essay enjoys a clear overall structure, and the question is very well understood and addressed. To be more specific, the correct use of collocations is key here. It is best to avoid weird collocations; instead, we can focus on learning more common collocations with the words we already know.
All in all, this is a very good essay, bordering 6.5. Next time, with more accuracy, a 6.5 is really attainable.

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The 6.0 sample upgraded to 7.0+

In recent times, an increasing number of tourists are drawn to destinations with challenging conditions, such as the Sahara Desert or the Antarctic. This trend has sparked a debate regarding the advantages and drawbacks for these adventurous travelers. This essay will delve into both sides of the argument.

On the one hand, embarking on journeys to such harsh terrains can offer a range of benefits to tourists. Firstly, it provides a unique and unparalleled experience, allowing individuals to witness nature's extremes and broaden their horizons. Such encounters foster personal growth, as tourists develop resilience, adaptability, and a deeper appreciation for the planet's diverse ecosystems. Additionally, these challenging trips often serve as an opportunity for self-discovery and reflection, enabling individuals to disconnect from their usual routines and reconnect with their inner selves.

However, there are notable disadvantages associated with visiting such demanding locales. Safety concerns are paramount, as extreme conditions pose significant risks to tourists' health and well-being. Sudden weather changes, lack of essential resources, and the absence of medical facilities can put individuals in perilous situations. Moreover, these remote regions are often fragile environments that can be easily disrupted by human presence, raising concerns about ecological impact and conservation.

In conclusion, while venturing to challenging destinations like the Sahara Desert or the Antarctic offers travelers unique experiences and personal growth, the risks and potential harm to both the tourists and the environment cannot be ignored. Striking a balance between adventure and responsible tourism is crucial to ensure that the benefits of such journeys are maximized while minimizing their adverse effects.

297 words

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