IELTS Writing Task 2 essay sample 3275 – Band 6.0

IELTS Writing Task 2 - Essay

You should spend about 40 minutes on this task.

Write about the following topic:

In the future, more people will choose to go on holiday in their own country and not travel abroad on holiday.

Do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Write at least 250 words.

Arts and Entertainment, Task 2 essay, Travel and Tourism, Writing samples, Writing topics

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Disclaimer

The writing sample displayed here is the work of IELTS candidates and has been assessed by our team for guidance and practice purposes. These scores are not official IELTS scores.

Candidate’s Response:

In the future , going abroad is not an issue for people who would like to have vacation and they would prefer to go on holiday in their own Country.

Firstly , they would little time to go abroad . As people are going to be busy because the pace of life is high and they don’t have time to take a foreign tour . They would prefer to go on their own Country for holiday . Such travel would be Convenient and enough for Someone who would like to have vacation at minimum time . In addition , the Cost of travel would be Considerable if people will go for having travel abroad , thus they would prefer to save their money by going on holiday in their own teritory which will more accessible and economical Compared to foreign travel . Moreover , the facilities around the world will be the same . By the advent of technological advances , different Countries Could Connect to each other and adapt themselves to Countries which are developed and have better facilities . As a result , individuals would not observe distinct variation between their own Country and others . They would go on holiday in their own Country where they could experience whatever are available in foreign Country with highest standard which encourages them to persist with this trend .

On the other hand , Some people would go for traveling abroad so as to visit other places which are new and could enhance their knowledge in this regard . But as a result of having negative effects on them like wasting a lot of time and money in other Country , the number of these people will be reducing and as result , more people will go on holiday in their owm region .

In Conclusion , i believe that more individuals would go on holiday in their own Coutry because of lack of time and saving money , also , they could experience the same facilities in their own Country . Although some persons would head for traveling abroad , the number of them won’t Considerable .

359 words

Presented By: Shahab Hosseinzadeh

February 26, 2024

This is an IELTS writing band 6.0 sample

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Disclaimer

The writing sample displayed here is the work of IELTS candidates and has been assessed by our team for guidance and practice purposes. These scores are not official IELTS scores.

Assessor’s Comment

Thank you indeed for writing this essay. Each paragraph begins with a topic sentence. The topic sentence is the most general of all the other sentences in that paragraph. That means we must wait to start our paragraphs with the first reason; there must be a sentence before introducing the possible causes. On the plus side, the vocabulary range is rich with minimum errors.

Kasra Sharifan

IELTS Writing Band Descriptors:

Task Response

9.0 fully addresses all parts of the task

8.0 presents a well-developed response to the question

7.0 presents, extends, and supports main ideas, but there may be a tendency to over-generalize and/or supporting ideas may lack focus

7.0

Coherence and Cohesion

6.0 arranges information and ideas coherently

6.0 there is a clear overall progression

6.0 uses cohesive devices effectively, but cohesion within and/or between sentences may be faulty or mechanical

6.0 may not always use referencing clearly or appropriately

6.0 uses paragraphing, but not always logically

6.0

Lexical Resource

7.0 uses a sufficient range of vocabulary to allow some flexibility and precision

6.0 attempts to use less common vocabulary but with some inaccuracy

6.0 makes some errors in spelling and/or word formation

6.0 they do not impede communication

6.0

Grammatical Range and Accuracy

6.0 uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms

6.0 complex sentences have the same accuracy as the simple ones do

6.0 makes some errors in grammar and punctuation

5.0 errors can cause some difficulty for the reader

5.0

6.0

Feedback:

Thank you indeed for writing this essay. Each paragraph begins with a topic sentence. The topic sentence is the most general of all the other sentences in that paragraph. That means we must wait to start our paragraphs with the first reason; there must be a sentence before introducing the possible causes. On the plus side, the vocabulary range is rich with minimum errors.

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The 6.0 sample upgraded to 7.0+

In the forthcoming years, a growing trend toward domestic holidays over international travel is a topic under scrutiny. While some contend that more individuals will prefer vacations within their own countries, I firmly disagree with this projection, considering several factors that advocate for continued international travel.

Primarily, the allure of exploring diverse cultures, traditions, and landscapes in foreign countries remains a significant draw for travelers. International travel offers unique experiences, exposure to different customs, and a broader perspective on global diversity, enriching one's understanding of the world. Additionally, accessibility to information and ease of travel have increased, making international trips more feasible and enticing.

Furthermore, the desire for new experiences and the aspiration to visit renowned global landmarks or natural wonders often motivates people to travel abroad. Tourist attractions, historical sites, and scenic locations in foreign countries often hold an allure that transcends domestic offerings, enticing travelers seeking novelty and adventure.

Moreover, globalization and interconnectedness have fostered a global community, encouraging cross-border exchanges and collaborations. This interconnectedness promotes travel and cultural exchanges, fostering mutual understanding and cooperation among nations.

While domestic tourism holds its appeal, especially regarding convenience and support for local economies, the allure of international travel, with its promise of diverse experiences and cultural immersion, remains a strong motivator for travelers.

In conclusion, despite the potential for growth in domestic tourism, the enduring appeal and myriad attractions of international travel, including cultural experiences and global exploration, suggest that people will continue to prioritize traveling abroad for their holidays in the foreseeable future.

254 words

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