IELTS Writing Task 2 essay sample 3136 – Band 5.5

IELTS Writing Task 2 - Essay

You should spend about 40 minutes on this task.

Write about the following topic:

As most people spend a major part of their adult life at work, job satisfaction is an important element of individual well-being.
What factors contribute to job satisfaction?
How realistic is the expectation of job satisfaction for all workers?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Write at least 250 words.

Disclaimer

The writing sample displayed here is the work of IELTS candidates and has been assessed by our team for guidance and practice purposes. These scores are not official IELTS scores.

Candidate’s Response:

nowadays, the level of welfare among the people depends on level off fulfilment of their occupation because most of matures lifetime included of their career. I think job satisfaction originated from amount of income and great relations between colleagues.Some may argue that it could not be possible for all workers, but there are some solutions. 

There are two fundamental reasons to have satisfaction in an occupation which have direct impact on fulfilment of adult life. First, people have been almost always considered about their income, having a fair amount of them even can cause happines in an employee because people tend to have a feeling of respect from their own employer which most of them can come from payment that employer should give them. Another reason is about the atmosphere and relationships of the job which can increase significantly the rate of employee satisfaction. In my experience, due to close and respectful behavior, that my colleagues have in our department, most of us, by the last questionnaire admitted that enjoy from their jobs.

Possibility of having these factors throughout every worker may decreas by some obstcles that some jobs faces. For example, a foreigner worker which work at a restaurant, cleaning and washing dishes, cannot communicate friendly with others kitchen stuff, because of lack of language knowledge and different culture, also, his boss may take advantage of him through giving poor amount of payment as poor knowledge about them rights. But, this would solve by educating those workers about their rights and attending in courses which give them basic information about new language and culture of new country that they live. As a result, it would quite possible for everyone to have enjoyment in their job in order to life fulfillment.

In conclusion, I strongly believe that everyone can have jobs satisfaction throughout their income and atmosphere of their work place.

311 words
Presented By: Shahab Hosseinzadeh

Presented By: Shahab Hosseinzadeh

March 29, 2024

This is an IELTS writing band 5.5 sample

Disclaimer

The writing sample displayed here is the work of IELTS candidates and has been assessed by our team for guidance and practice purposes. These scores are not official IELTS scores.

Assessor’s Comment

Thank you indeed for writing this essay. The essay provides a basic response to the task with an attempt to discuss the factors contributing to job satisfaction and the realism of achieving it for all workers. However, the ideas are not fully developed, and there are noticeable issues with lexical resource and grammatical accuracy that hinder communication. The overall band score reflects a performance that conveys a response but with limited clarity and development.


Kasra Sharifan

IELTS Writing Band Descriptors:

Task Response
7.0 addresses all parts of the task
6.0 presents a relevant position although the conclusions may become unclear or repetitive
6.0 presents relevant main ideas but some may be inadequately developed/unclear
6.0
Coherence and Cohesion
7.0 logically organizes information and ideas
6.0 there is a clear overall progression
6.0 uses cohesive devices effectively, but cohesion within and/or between sentences may be faulty or mechanical
6.0 may not always use referencing clearly or appropriately
6.0 uses paragraphing, but not always logically
6.0
Lexical Resource
6.0 uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task
6.0 attempts to use less common vocabulary but with some inaccuracy
6.0 makes some errors in spelling and/or word formation
5.0 that may cause some difficulty for the reader
5.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
6.0 uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms
5.0 attempts complex sentences but these tend to be less accurate than simple sentences
6.0 makes some errors in grammar and punctuation
5.0 errors can cause some difficulty for the reader
5.0
5.5

Feedback:

Thank you indeed for writing this essay. The essay provides a basic response to the task with an attempt to discuss the factors contributing to job satisfaction and the realism of achieving it for all workers. However, the ideas are not fully developed, and there are noticeable issues with lexical resource and grammatical accuracy that hinder communication. The overall band score reflects a performance that conveys a response but with limited clarity and development.

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The IELTS Assessor

Kasra Sharifan

Kasra Sharifan

Co-founder and CFO

British Council certified English teacher, IDP-trained IELTS instructor, content writer, editor-in-chief, co-founder, and Chief Financial Officer (CFO) at IELTS Juice Online Academy.

An Above 7.0 Sample

Job satisfaction plays a pivotal role in individual well-being, considering the significant amount of time adults spend in the workplace. Several factors contribute to job satisfaction, but attaining universal contentment among all workers might prove unrealistic due to the diversity in needs and circumstances.
The determinants of job satisfaction encompass a multitude of aspects within the work environment. A positive workplace culture, characterized by supportive colleagues, effective leadership, and a sense of belonging, contributes significantly to job satisfaction. Opportunities for career growth, skill development, and recognition for contributions enhance employees' fulfillment and motivation. Moreover, fair compensation, job security, and a healthy work-life balance are crucial aspects that influence satisfaction levels among workers.
However, the expectation of universal job satisfaction faces practical limitations. Individuals possess diverse aspirations, values, and preferences shaped by their unique backgrounds and experiences. What one employee considers fulfilling might not align with another's expectations, leading to varied perceptions of job satisfaction. Moreover, external factors like economic conditions, industry norms, or organizational policies can exert considerable influence on job satisfaction, often beyond an individual's control.
While certain factors significantly contribute to job satisfaction, achieving complete contentment among all workers may not be attainable. Instead, a more realistic approach involves acknowledging and accommodating diverse needs and circumstances within the workforce. Organizations should strive to create inclusive work environments that consider a spectrum of individual preferences, allowing employees to find fulfillment in ways that align with their values and goals.
In conclusion, while various factors contribute to job satisfaction, expecting uniform contentment for all workers might not be feasible due to the diversity of individual needs and circumstances. Embracing this diversity and crafting flexible workplace policies can facilitate greater satisfaction among employees, contributing to overall well-being in the workplace.
289 words

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