IELTS Writing Task 2 essay sample 2831 – Band 8.0

IELTS Writing Task 2 - Essay

You should spend about 40 minutes on this task.

Write about the following topic:

Many jobs at around the house are done manually but could have been done by machines instead.
What are the advantages or disadvantages of this?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Write at least 250 words.

Disclaimer

The writing sample displayed here is the work of IELTS candidates and has been assessed by our team for guidance and practice purposes. These scores are not official IELTS scores.

Candidate’s Response:

The advent of industrialization, in particular the invention of machines, has brought about some substantial changes most of which possess both positive and negative faces. In the following essay, I seek to enlist some of these minus and plus points in clearer details.

To begin with, it sounds crystal clear that substitution of manual works by machines has led to a dramatic decline in people’s dynamism per se. Subsequently, they establish a more sedentary life style inasmuch as there is no need to perform tasks like washing the dishes or doing the laundry manually any more. As a result, many gain weight constantly and the over-weight proportion of the society increases gradually. In addition to the hurt for individuals, lack of movement has proved to be one crucial factor when contemplating the reasons of contemporary diseases. Heart attacks, high blood pressure, and clinically measurable depressions for example, are undoubtedly some repercussions of this shift from manually done jobs to machine performed ones. But is this the whole truth though?

While factoring the consequences of this trend, it would be subjective if we do not pay attention to the extreme convenience caused by machines in our lives. In other words, the more we use machines for our house chores, the more convenient we feel at home and face less difficulty accordingly. Additionally, in comparison to when there were no machines at homes, these days, we perform all subjects with relatively much more speed. For instance, when one needs to prepare some tomato juice, a mixer can definitely boost the speed and efficiency of the procedure. This ultimately provides the possibility of multitasking and reduces the time spent on household jobs.

In conclusion, although machines generate some problems for individuals and societies, under no circumstances would I believe that their disadvantages outweigh the advantages since they make our lives much easier and save us lots of quality time.

316 words
Presented By: Shahab Hosseinzadeh

Presented By: Shahab Hosseinzadeh

March 20, 2024

This is an IELTS writing band 8.0 sample

Disclaimer

The writing sample displayed here is the work of IELTS candidates and has been assessed by our team for guidance and practice purposes. These scores are not official IELTS scores.

Assessor’s Comment

Thank you indeed for writing this essay. This response effectively addresses the prompt by discussing both the advantages and disadvantages of using machines for household tasks. The writer presents a balanced view, acknowledging the negative impacts on physical health and the prevalence of modern diseases due to decreased physical activity, as well as highlighting the convenience and time-saving benefits that machines bring to our lives. The essay is well-structured, with clear introductory and concluding paragraphs, and coherent development of ideas.


Kasra Sharifan

IELTS Writing Band Descriptors:

Task Response
9.0 fully addresses all parts of the task
9.0 presents a fully developed position in answer to the question
9.0 with relevant, fully extended, and well-supported ideas
9.0
Coherence and Cohesion
9.0 sequences information and ideas logically
9.0 uses cohesion in such a way that it attracts no attention
9.0 uses a range of cohesive devices appropriately
9.0 uses referencing clearly and appropriately throughout
8.0 uses paragraphing sufficiently and appropriately
8.0
Lexical Resource
9.0 uses a wide range of vocabulary
8.0 skillfully uses uncommon lexical items but there may be occasional inaccuracies in word choice and collocation
7.0 may produce occasional errors in word choice, spelling and/or word formation
9.0 the communication is completely natural
7.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
9.0 uses a wide range of structures
9.0 with full flexibility and accuracy
8.0 makes only very occasional errors or inappropriacies
9.0 communication is completely natural
8.0
8.0

Feedback:

Thank you indeed for writing this essay. This response effectively addresses the prompt by discussing both the advantages and disadvantages of using machines for household tasks. The writer presents a balanced view, acknowledging the negative impacts on physical health and the prevalence of modern diseases due to decreased physical activity, as well as highlighting the convenience and time-saving benefits that machines bring to our lives. The essay is well-structured, with clear introductory and concluding paragraphs, and coherent development of ideas.

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Another Above 7.0 Sample

In the contemporary era, the advent of technology has revolutionized the way household tasks are executed. While traditionally these chores were predominantly performed manually, there is a growing trend towards the automation of such tasks. This essay will explore the advantages and disadvantages of this shift towards mechanization.
One of the most significant advantages of automating household chores is the substantial time savings it offers. For instance, the use of robotic vacuum cleaners and dishwashers has liberated individuals from the time-consuming tasks of sweeping and washing dishes, respectively. This newfound time can be redirected towards more productive or leisure activities, thereby enhancing the quality of life. Furthermore, the precision and efficiency of machines often surpass human capabilities, resulting in a higher standard of cleanliness and maintenance.
Moreover, the automation of household tasks can be particularly beneficial for individuals with physical limitations or the elderly. Robotic devices can perform tasks that might be challenging or impossible for these individuals, thus fostering a sense of independence and reducing the need for external assistance.
However, the transition to automated household chores is not devoid of disadvantages. One of the primary concerns is the financial investment required for the acquisition of these machines. The initial cost of purchasing robotic cleaners or smart appliances can be prohibitively expensive for many households. Additionally, there is the issue of maintenance and repair, which can further inflate the overall expense.
Another disadvantage is the potential for reduced physical activity. As machines take over more tasks, individuals may find fewer reasons to engage in physical movements within their homes, which could have negative implications for their health. Moreover, the reliance on machines could lead to a depreciation of traditional skills, as future generations may never learn how to perform these tasks manually.
In conclusion, the automation of household chores offers a plethora of advantages, including time savings, improved efficiency, and enhanced accessibility for those with physical limitations. However, these benefits are counterbalanced by the financial costs, potential health implications, and the erosion of traditional skills. As society continues to embrace technology, it is imperative to strike a balance between automation and manual labor to ensure a harmonious and sustainable lifestyle.
362 words

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